Sailors forget how to fish, they lose 8-5

Have you ever been caught? I don’t mean in the online dating sense of the word, but rather from a literal catfish perspective. You’re out fishing, and you get a huge bite, but as you roll it you realize it’s just a catfish, not the huge black drum you were hoping to eat for dinner.

Ruby Ray is a catfish. Signing the Cy Young award winner should be a huge deal. But, as we have seen, there is not so much meat on it, like catfish. I would also argue that Ruby is specifically a floating catfish, as he has a good chance of poisoning the toys he appears in. Ruby tends to explode. Other Mariners shooters gain losses by giving up two rounds in the third round and then not getting any support from the attack. When Robbie Ray gains losses, he earns them. In half of his 20 starts, he gave up at least 3 runs or 5 hits.

And so it was today. As a fisherman, today it tasted great, everyone wanted a bite. He couldn’t adjust the hook, or in this case pull the string, and gave up his home run to Altuve on his first pitch, followed by a home run to Peña on his seventh pitch. It wasn’t a great start for Robbie.

The second and third rounds weren’t that great either. In the second, he gave up five consecutive hits, and the third doubled, to make the score 5-0. These hits came in all different flavors, from seeing-eyes, to pop-ups that somehow became multiples of the floor base, to shallow flying balls that Dylan Moore couldn’t reach. And the first to get out of the half? She wasn’t pretty either.

After the third-place RBI took the score to 6-0, Robbie finished the inning and ended his day. The catfish was thrown from the pier and returned to the sea.

The Bulls were more attractive, as Ben Murphy retired the six he faced (by four strokes), Tommy Mellon had two good runs (and one bad), Matt Vista became unlucky, and Andres Muñoz made ninth, including the new record for fastest Mariners Stadium In the era of statcast.

Mellon’s bad turn was eighth, taking a double, then walking twice to load the bases with one. Fiesta replaced him and quickly got the second ball, but then Maldonado hit a volley into no-man’s-land that touched the grass and gave the catcher two RBIs.

Regarding the fish here on the Gulf Coast, I would say Murphy is a red fish (reliable, sturdy), Melon is a black cylinder (similar, but has sharp teeth that sometimes hurts you), Vista is a mullet (not the best fished, but good in places certain), and muñoz is rainbow trout (bright, but also with good texture).

If you can’t figure it out, you’ve recently started getting back into fishing. Things are not going well.

A couple of weeks ago, I made all the required purchases, set up my rigs, and went into the water. After about five hours, I haven’t caught (0) fish. A week later, I made it to LL 10-Day IL when I fell into a patch of oysters and cut off my leg and finger, narrowly avoiding stitches. The next time I went out fishing, I caught only a small catfish, and I almost got poisoned by one fish when I tried to untie it. It’s safe to say that I might not be the best Hunter in the world.

As I suggest, neither are sailors hitters. They all went hunting, by that I mean the chase pitches, hitting Suarez, Toren and Hagerti twice each. It took even Abraham Toro, my darling, on the seventh day for a navigator to reach second base. Toro was in the match only in first place because Winker was withdrawn after colliding with Jeremy Peña in a kick inside the field. Peña forgot where he was, ran straight into Winker’s path without noticing, and Jesse’s ankle paid the price. According to Scott, it’s day in and day out, and they hope to keep him away from IL.

Ruby Ray may have a company like catfish today, as Peña also tried to poison sailors. This, of course, comes after Julio injured his wrist in Texas, so the playing field is looking a little rough at the moment.

“But Jake! If the Mariners’ offense was bad, how did they score 5 runs?” I hear you yell at me. Well, the way any team scores. The threads some blows together. On the seventh, Toru walked in, and D-Mo hit one song to put it two and put Sam Haggerty into a threesome. Then JP doubled to score to put the game in hand.

Then on the 8th, Kyle Lewis walked, followed by our beloved Abraham Toro, for the eighth time at home this year, and the first since this time last month. The last time Toro hit a ground run, the Mariners immediately started a 14-game winning streak. I’m just saying.

After the dong, Santana and mushroom walked Dylan, to bring the chain link to the plate at Sam Haggerty. who hit the spot. And that’s where I think we should have a discussion. Is bringing peg racing to the board a close-up game? Or does the game need to have the atmosphere of a close match? Because literally from the first pitch, this game wasn’t winnable, but just stating facts like this makes it seem like it is. I’m a little annoyed, because I only planned to do these fish summary photos with modified Mariners heads, but then they had to go and be “respectful” or something. It’s also a shame. I’m sure you all would like to see what Eugenio Suarez looks like as a bluefin tuna.

So the Mariners lost, but the loss to Houston doesn’t hurt much. They are a good team, and this has always been a tough streak. I think the positive trend for the Mariners is that these upcoming matches against the Astros and Yankees are pretty much the last “good teams” they’ll have to play against in the regular season. Combine that with the other teams vying with Seattle for a Wild Card loss today, and this game doesn’t really mean much. It’s probably okay for M’s to eat veggies before dessert. We hope, though, that they rush into a pair of big showdowns against Rangers tomorrow.

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